Sonder - n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.
“Where are you from?”
“What do you do?”
“What brought you here?”
“Where are you off to next?”
These are the common questions I get asked regularly as I am traveling, and meeting new people whether it be a local standing behind me in line, or having dinner with my RY friends at an Indian restaurant in the middle of Bangkok. Every encounter with a person almost always results in some sort of story exchange.
Most of us can vividly reflect on the turning points that brought us toward where we are today. Often during these transitional periods major life events push us to pursue the inner peace, and happiness we are all seeking. The way we choose to disseminate the facts, and arrange the plot points are critical to shaping who we are. Creating the narratives to ours lives is a fundamental part of being human. A life story doesn’t just say what happened. It tells you why it was important, what it means for who the person is, for who they’re becoming, and what is going to happen next.
I’ve learned that sharing your life story, and listening to others is important because:
Your story helps you find your voice. Telling your story is a form of expression. It forces you to think about what has happened in your life in a way that makes sense. If you’ve interpreted the events of your life to mean that you’re unlucky, then it’s hard to look optimistically at the future. Alternatively, if you acknowledge that you’ve made mistakes, and faced challenges, but sought redemption you might feel a much greater sense of resiliency.
Your story reaffirms your values. It is so easy to get swept up in the day-to-day operations of life. Taking some time to pause can help clarify what is important to you, and remind you of your priorities.
Your story can help others. The best things in life are shared. You’ll never know what taking others along the journey can do. It may encourage others to do something they never thought was possible. Your story matters more than you know, and sharing it could create the permission for someone else to do the same.
Speaking your heartfelt truth is deeply satisfying, both to do, and to witness. It’s that sharing of yourself that allows us to feel more connected, and foster meaningful relationships, but it is also the key to our well-being. Don’t underestimate the power of your story.
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